


The Matchmaking Games

by alisaholmes



Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bucky Barnes Is a Good Bro, Clint and Nat help, F/M, Flashbacks, Jarvis is a Therapist, Maria Hill Feels, Pining, Shit gets real after Chapter 4, Steve Rogers Feels, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Is a Good Bro, Weird Plot Shit
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-27
Updated: 2016-09-16
Packaged: 2018-07-10 11:50:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6983872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alisaholmes/pseuds/alisaholmes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Tony, Clint and Natasha make a bet about the Ice Queen, Steve decides to stop it after he learns the identity of said Queen. Little does Steve know that the whole bet may or may not be an elaborate matchmaking plan from a certain genius. Things seem to be going well with the plan, until a new green villain shows up, as well as an ally, who messes up Tony's ship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Bet

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! This is my first fic on AO3, and this story is also under alisaholmes on fanfiction.net, if you'd like to check it out there. I have nine chapters posted on fanfiction.net, if you want to read ahead.
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

Steve took one look at the three Avengers and immediately knew that something was up. He wasn't sure what exactly tipped him off though: maybe it was Tony Stark’s villainous laughs, or Clint Barton’s sneaky glances, or even the slight upturn of Natasha’s lips. Or maybe because they were all huddled in the kitchen pantry certainly not being conspicuous. Steve strode right toward them, not even making an attempt to be stealthy.

“What’s up, Spangles?’ Tony said, immediately covering up their conversation and bringing Clint and Natasha’s attention to the super soldier. Like that wasn't totally suspicious.

“Do I even want to know what you three are planning?” Steve asked.

“Probably not,” Clint conceded. Steve rolled his eyes and glared at Tony; Tony was usually the one that was easiest to break with just a stare, but miraculously he did not say a word. He merely looked at his co-conspirators, who each gave him a nod of approval. It seemed so business-like, something Steve could never imagine Tony being.

“We are making a bet among ourselves,”  Tony replied. Steve let out a sigh of relief. At least it wasn't something that involved pranking or the Hulk or both. That didn't go well last time. But Steve hesitated. It was pretty common of these three to cause mischief, but a bet seemed too harmless. He cocked an eyebrow, his own symbol for tell me now before I dropkick you. It was a skill he had to perfect to become the leader of the Avengers.

“Oh there’s the dropkick look,” Tony commented. Natasha nodded her head in agreement but Clint looked skeptical.

“I don't see it,” Clint said, tilting his head, focusing on Steve.

“Aren’t you named Hawkeye for your exceptional eyesight?” Tony asked.

“Yes,” Clint replied.

“Then why can’t you see the dropkick look?” Tony exploded. Natasha nodded her head in agreement and gave Tony a high five. Steve had to admit that that Tony’s response was, how do they say it, _ahh_ on point. But he also realized that Tony was changing the subject and Steve wanted to know what that bet was about.

“Well what’s the bet on?” Steve asked, diverting the conversation. It seemed as though this time, Clint was the spokesperson for the group. He received approving nods from both Natasha and Tony before he spoke.

“The bet is to make the Ice Queen laugh. Whoever does it first gets a gift certificate to that new restaurant that Tony owns, called Pepper,” Clint said. Tony pulled out an embossed envelope as Clint was speaking.

“It's a restaurant I gave to Pepper for her birthday that even I pay to go in because it's that awesome,” Tony exclaimed.

‘And I’m going to win this bet,” Natasha cut in,”because Bruce and I really would enjoy a date night and...” she trailed off and didn't finish her sentence.

“Stop thinking about his zucchini!” Tony interjected. Clint rolled his eyes at the two and started to speak.

“Actually, I’ll be winning that bet,” he said, plucking the envelope from Tony’s hand, “Laura and I have been dying to have a date night. Three kids are killer, man,” Clint said, but Steve could see the love in Clint’s eyes for his family.

Steve thought for a moment; who would he like to take on this fancy dinner? Seventy years ago he would have said Peggy, heck even a couple years ago when he found out Peggy was still alive, he would have taken her. But now a different name popped into his head, Maria. However, she would probably shut him down before he had even had the thought of asking her. Reluctantly, Steve turned his head back to the conversation, which included the three Avengers bickering over who would win the bet.

“LIke you could ever make the Ice Queen laugh,” Clint sneered at Natasha.

“What are you gonna do, dress up like a clown?” Natasha retorted.

“Wait, who’s the Ice Queen?” Steve asked. That part still confused him. The three Avengers dramatically turned toward Steve, all bickering done now. To Steve, it seemed that the trio had a new problem. From the looks on their faces, he was guessing it was his ignorance.

“You really don't know who the Ice Queen is? Even JARVIS knows who the Ice Queen is!” Tony shouted.

“That I do, sir,” JARVIS added.

“Not helping, guys,” Steve said, sounding a little miffed. He hated this feeling of being left out; for Gosh sake, Steve had already been left out for about seventy years.

“I can’t believe this,” Tony exclaimed, and dramatically collapsed on the nearest kitchen stool. Clint and Natasha rolled their eyes at the exact time that Steve couldn't help but think that it was practiced.

“Anyway, if Drama Queen over there is done, let me tell you who the Ice Queen is” Natasha said, bringing Steve’s attention back to her. He nodded in anticipation expecting some random S.H.I.E.L.D. agent’s name to be pulled out of nowhere.

“Maria Hill is the Ice Queen.”

**:~~:~~:~~:~~:~~:~~:**

Steve froze for a second, the words ringing in his ears. Maria? The Ice Queen? But Maria radiated warmth! It shined through her amber eyes, through those soft smiles she gave once in awhile. Heck, she could make heat flush into Steve’s cheeks just by walking into the Avengers common room. (Though he still vehemently attributed that to the super serum flowing in his veins. It was just a coincidence that this “overheating” occurred whenever Maria was around).

“Ice Queen?” he managed to stammer out. Steve just couldn’t understand why Natasha, Clint and Tony would call her the Ice Queen. Well, he could understand why Tony would call her that, as the genius had a penchant for nicknames for his teammates and friends. It had taken weeks for Steve to stop Tony from calling him the “Star Spangled Man with a Plan”. Even longer to stop him from playing the song everytime he walked into the common room. But calling Maria the “Ice Queen” seemed a little harsh, especially when Clint and Natasha were supposed to be Maria’s best friends.

“Well everyone at S.H.I.E.L.D. called Maria, Ice Queen because she is completely heartless.” Clint answered. Natasha and Tony nodded their heads in agreement.

“But Maria isn’t heartless!” Steve defended. The accusation annoyed him more than it should have. After all, ever since Maria had started working at Stark Industries, she had started to lower her guard a little. Even Dr. Banner who was completely oblivious to Natasha’s flirting had commented on the longer smiles and the quick wit that Maria had never shown before.

“Come on Cap! Even Natasha has more emotions than her!” Clint argued. He received a slap in the head as well from Natasha.

“That cannot be true” Steve said.

“Look Captain, have you ever seen her laugh? Like actual full blown peals of laughter?” Tony asked. Steve was about vigorously answer in the affirmative, when he hesitated. Really, the only time he had ever seen Maria laughing her heart out was during Avenger parties, when she was totally drunk. Of course, there were those moments when she would come to see him and vent about working at Stark Industries. Those sessions ended up in laughter but Steve wanted to keep that to himself. He stayed silent and Tony took that as a cue to continue.

“So that’s why we made the bet. To actually see the Ice Queen laugh--with no alcohol. Want to join?” Steve quickly nodded his head, joining in the bet.

“Great,” Natasha added, “Let the games begin.” And at those words, Steve walked away from the Avengers, his mind swirling with conflicted thoughts.

**:~~:~~:~~:~~:~~:~~:**

As soon as Steve walked away, Tony spun toward the two super spies not even trying to be discreet.

“That was his _I’m going to do something about this_ face, right? Tony asked.

“Yup, I actually saw that look this time,” Clint confirmed. Natasha rolled her eyes but didn’t say anything else on the matter.

“Shall I inform Mr. Barnes of Captain Roger’s current location?” JARVIS asked.

“Yes, Jar. Tell him to commence Phase 2,” Tony said.

“Let the matchmaking games begin,” Natasha announced, sharing a smirk with Clint and Tony. Just then, Bruce and Thor walked in for breakfast and stopped still at the sight at the three. Bruce sighed and pulled off his glasses.

“Do we want to know?” he asked, indicating Thor and himself.

“Probably not sweetie,” Natasha replied.


	2. The Romantic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve ruminates about his feelings about Maria with some help from a punching bag and his best friend and decides to take some action, as Tony and the others watch on.

Steve punched the bag without much effort, but it still went swinging off the hook like a child jumping off a swing. _Twelve_ , he silently counted in his head as he went to hang up another one. The closing of the gym door echoed in the empty room, and Steve looked up to see Bucky walking in with a charming grin on his face.

“What’s up, doc?” he asked. Steve smiled at his Bugs Bunny reference.

“Nothing,” Steve said, as he started to punch the bag.

“Nothing?” Bucky echoed, eyes raised over the eleven shattered punching bags lying to the side.

“I wouldn’t say that eleven punching bags, plus that one you’re abusing over there, is nothing.” Steve shook his head and returned to his bag. Bucky came around the back and held the bag still, as Steve smashed it.

“You know when you were younger, I could always tell that you were frustrated because of the way your jaw was set. Glad to see that hasn't changed,” Bucky reminisced, trying to bait him. Steve didn't say anything, just kept striking the bag. “Glad to also see that you still keep everything bottled up like some idiot,” Bucky muttered.

‘I heard that,” Steve said, turning away from the punching bag, and taking a break on the closest bench. He grabbed his water bottle from the side as Bucky joined him.

“Now what’s on your mind?” Bucky asked.

“Just a silly bet that Tony, Clint and Natasha made about Maria,” Steve responded, before taking a refreshing sip.

“You mean Maria Hill, that beautiful spy lady who’s masquerading as a PA for Stark.” Steve squirmed when Bucky claimed that Maria was pretty but really anybody would know that just by looking at her.

“Yup.”

“So what’s so horrible about the bet?’

“Nothing, really. It’s just that..”

“Just that?” Bucky prompted.

“Well the reasons that Tony, Clint and Natasha are using. They make her out to be some unemotional person with a heart of ice. They even call her the Ice Queen. But I know she isn't like that.”

“You saw Frozen too?”

“Yup. Tony put it at the top of my list,” Steve responded, before taking another sip. The cool water soothed his parched throat but did nothing for his anger.

“So you think by having this bet, they are insulting Maria?” Bucky deduced.

“How are they not insulting Maria?”

“Well,” Bucky started, “Isn’t that how she is? Never talks about her past, don’t even know if she actually has a family, heck, do you know her favorite color?”

“Navy Blue.” Steve blurted. Bucky looked at him with surprise. “What? I talk to her occasionally.” Bucky, with a cheeky grin on his face, stood up and offered Steve his arm. Steve took it and rose from the bench.

“Glad to also see that your I’m so in love face hasn’t changed either.”

“What?” Steve asked, hoping, actually praying to God, that there was no tell tale blush on his cheeks.

“Oh please, don't try lying to your best friend of eighty years, give or take a couple. I’ve seen that face every time you looked at Peggy. How would I not recognize it?” Bucky asked. Steve didn’t say a word, just returned to his punching bag with harder hits.

“So what are you going to do about it?” Bucky questioned, over Steve’s punches. Steve paused.

“That’s the thing, I have no clue.” Steve said.

“I think I do.”

**:~~:~~:~~:~~:~~:~~:**

Steve stood in front of Maria’s office not daring to step in. Instead, he had been pacing outside for about ten minutes and received no less than five questioning glances from other employees. For a man of action, Steve was remarkably inactive about his predicament. Bucky’s plan ran through his head, but as Peggy had said some seventy years ago, he was incapable of talking to women. Maria was a woman. Ergo, his problem. Summoning some semblance of bravery, Steve finally pulled open Maria’s door and walked into her office.

Just as he had predicted, she was sitting at her desk looking over paperwork. Her head had popped up as soon as he walked in. She gave him a smile that almost instantaneously morphed into a frown.

“Steve, hey, did I forget that we had lunch today?” she asked, shifting papers off her desk in search of something. Steve guessed it was for her Starkphone as she put all of her appointments on that six inch thing.

“Uhh no, I just wanted to talk to you,” Steve said, already wincing at how he sounded. He was using his interrogation voice, definitely not a great way to start the conversation. He cleared his throat in an attempt to return back to his normal baritone.

“Sorry, Steve but I’m—” she stopped as Steve pulled out a King size Hershey's bar from his leather jacket. “Totally available right now,” she finished. Steve chuckled and handed her the bar. Then, he took his usual seat in front of her.

“So,”she said as she unwrapped the chocolate, and gave him a piece, “what’s the bribe for?” Steve ducked his head down, trying to remember the next lines that Bucky had taught him next. But a bout of nervousness flooded through him, similar to what he experienced every time he had talked to Peggy, and everything that Bucky had taught him flew out his head.

“Wouldyouliketogotodinnerwithme?” Steve asked rapidly, then had an immense urge to go bang his head into a wall. Maria had dropped her chocolate into her lap in surprise and he heard a muffled noise somewhere. However, he was more focused on how he could be such an idiot. Apparently, even after seventy years, Steve was still incapable of talking to the other sex. He looked up to see Maria open her mouth to say something, but he put up a hand.

“God no that’s not what I meant. Really shouldn’t have led with that.” Steve said, wishing he could run of this office this instant.

“So what did you want to lead with?” Maria asked, her eyes dancing with slight amusement at his obvious embarrassment, but something was off. Steve could detect that at least. He ignored it though so he could get this conversation back on Bucky’s script.

“Would you like to prank Clint, Natasha and Tony?” Steve asked.

“Didn’t peg Captain America for the pranking type,” Maria answered, her face filled with a cheeky smile, “Why are we pranking them?”

“Because they are doing something that I don't exactly...approve of,” he settled on. He saw Maria opening her mouth for another question but Steve cut through. He didn’t particularly want to explain the circumstances of the bet.

“Plus, we would split a prize of dinner at Pepper’s restaurant,” Steve dangled in front of her. “Which is why I asked if you’d like to go to dinner with me.” Steve clarified, feeling his cheeks heating up.

He looked up to see Maria with an impassive face, oddly reminiscent of the mask she tended to wear while working for S.H.I.E.L.D.. She murmured something under her breath, but even with his enhanced hearing, he wasn’t able to catch a word.

“So will you do it?” he asked, hoping so much for a yes or any version of the word. Maria rolled her eyes at him in exasperation and studied his face for a moment before answering.

“Fine.” she said, sounding disgruntled. And at that one word, Steve couldn't help but let his face split into a wild grin. It wasn't every day you got Maria Hill to do something without much cajoling and bribing, but he was able to do it. Not to brag, but he was feeling pretty good about himself.

“Ok, so all you have to do is watch out for Clint, Tony, Natasha. Make sure you do not laugh at them at all, no matter what they do or say, don’t laugh.”

“This doesn’t sound like a prank.”

“Well trust me, it is.” Steve affirmed, as he rose from his chair. Now that he didn't have Bucky’s script to go off, he was starting to feel edgy again, so he turned to leave.

“I always trust you,” Maria said offhandedly as she rebooted her computer. Steve stopped at those words and looked back to see Maria staring at her computer, but wearing a small smirk. He could feel his own lips curving upwards as he left the office, an inescapable feeling of joy filling him. Come on, he made Maria agree to something she probably didn't want to do and also received a compliment from her. Right now, Steve was well past cloud nine and orbiting in the atmosphere.

**:~~:~~:~~:~~:~~:~~:**

“Whoo, I thought your boy was going to lose it there for a second,” Tony exclaimed, as they watched Steve walk out of Maria’s office on the screen. Bucky shot him a glare, but couldn’t argue. Even he thought Steve would mess it up, but he didn’t say it out loud. He was with Steve till the end of the line, which loosely translated to defending him against Tony Stark sometimes.

“Says the guy who almost messed it up by uttering a curse word,” Natasha said, looking at Tony with a raised eyebrow.

“Fortunately, Bucky here closed my mouth. Unfortunately, it was with that metal arm of his. When did you last clean it, 1962? I can still taste the rusting metal,” Tony said, while making retching noises. Clint chuckled at his antics and Bucky couldn’t help but laugh himself.

“Do you think they noticed?” Bucky finally asked, as the laughter subsided.

“I don’t think so,” Natasha replied.

“Did you hear what she said after Steve told her about the dinner?” Clint asked.

“She said something?” Natasha and Tony asked in unison.

“Steve said and I quote ‘Which is why I asked if you’d like to go to dinner with me.” to which Maria replied ‘Is that really the only reason?’. Man, she totally likes him,” Clint finished. Bucky looked at him in amazement; even his advanced Soviet tech didn’t pick that up. Tony looked skeptical, but then his confusion vanished.

“Oh your hearing aids, I forgot.” Tony said, and everyone’s puzzlement dissolved.

“Oh my god,” Natasha whispered, “so you were right! I kinda just went along with it in the beginning but I never thought you were actually correct. I can't believe me and Clint didn't pick that up. We’re her longest friends!” she directed toward Tony. The billionaire shrugged, feigning modesty.

“How do you think you and Bruce got together? Or Vision and the Witch?” Tony asked.

“The Vision and the Witch aren’t together.” Bucky stated. Tony threw him a glare.

“Check back in a couple of weeks will you?” Clint couldn’t help but drop his mouth.

“You mean that vacation I won with Laura—”

“Yup.” Tony answered and walked away. “Get ready for Phase 3, Bucky,” he said, but Clint, Bucky and Natasha just stared at his retreating figure.

“What is that man?” Natasha murmured. “Every time I think I have a read on him, he completely crushes it.”

“At least we know one thing,“Clint said, looking at Natasha and Bucky, “Tony Stark is a romantic.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Liked it? Didn't? Let me know! I love me some constructive criticism.


	3. The Wingman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky executes Phase 3 of Tony’s 'How to Hook Up a Capsicle and an Ice Queen’ initiative, and tries to be a good wing man for Steve. Afterwards, Clint feels like an idiot for not realizing that his best friend maybe liked a certain patriotic individual.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omg i'm loving the response to this fic, thank you so much!!!  
> Hope you all enjoy the next installment :)

Bucky was strategically waiting at the kitchen counter of the Avengers common room. Since the kitchen opened up to the living area, his position gave him a fine view of the elevators. He needed a fine view, because according to Phase 3 of Tony’s ‘How to Hook Up a Capsicle and an Ice Queen’ initiative, Maria was going to come up those elevators any minute, and then he would have to execute his charm. Charm, meaning, being a huge wing man for Steve.

Bucky was guaranteed the common room for at least an half and hour, as Bruce was tucked away in his lab, and Thor was training in the gym. That was all the time he had to convince Maria to go to dinner with Steve. It was definitely a simple task, but not easy to accomplish.

He shifted the comm in his ear, and held a knife in his right hand and a tomato in his left metallic arm. To the casual observer, it would look like Bucky was making a sandwich for lunch, but he was trying to convince Maria Hill, spy extraordinaire, of this fact, so he had a slew of ingredients scattered everywhere. He kept his knife on top of the bright red skin of the fruit, ready to start acting.

“Ok,” Tony mumbled in his comm, “Remember, all you have to do is make her fall in love with Steve.” Bucky rolled his eyes at Tony’s exaggeration.“Ok, T-minus 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 and action!” On cue, the elevator dinged and Bucky started chopping the tomato like it was nobody’s business. The familiar click clack of heels tapped on the granite floor, and Bucky looked up feigning surprise at seeing Maria walk into the tower.

“Maria, what can I do for you?” Bucky said, all smiles and cheer. She narrowed her eyes at him just as Tony spoke in his ear.

“Jeez, will you tone down the exuberance? You sound like a princess out of a fucking Disney movie.” Bucky heard murmurs of agreement in his comm, but fought to to show any signs of annoyance on his face. Luckily, Maria seemed to disregard it and asked him a question.

“Did you see Pepper anywhere? She asked me to bring her these files,” she said, holding up a thick manila folder stamped with the Stark Industries symbol.

“Nope.” So that was Tony’s distraction. Huh, it was actually plausible and not at all extravagant.

“JARVIS, do you know where she is?” Maria asked the invisible A.I.. As practiced earlier, JARVIS responded as Tony told him to.

“I’m afraid Ms. Potts is otherwise...occupied with Mr. Stark. You are welcome to wait in the kitchen with Mr. Barnes, Agent Hill.” Maria rolled her eyes and dropped down into her seat with huff of annoyance.

“I make killer sandwiches,” Bucky offered.

“No pickles,” Maria said, and Bucky snickered as he grabbed two slices of bread from the loaf.

“What's so funny?” Maria asked, in a tone that sounded like she was going to slay him alive but was only not doing so because Bucky was her crush’s best friend. Well, at least to Bucky, it seemed that way.

“Steve doesn't like pickles or mayonnaise on his sandwich,” he said, hoping the conversation turned to the topic of Steve. Apparently, Tony also picked up the topic change.

“Pick up the bait, PICK UP THE BAIT!” Tony practically yelled into the comm. Really, Tony’s comments were not helping the scenario at all, but since he was the one orchestrating the matchmaking, Bucky had no choice but to go along with him. Right now, Bucky was regretting his decision, but instead he focused on the agent in front of him. She was frowning at him, and Bucky desperately hoped that he hadn’t blown his cover.

“How do you know so much about him?” Maria asked, and Bucky grinned widely. Agent Hill had caught the bait without knowing, and Bucky was practically frolicking on the inside.

“I know everything about that kid. I know his first kiss, his favorite Sinatra song, basically everything about him,” Bucky said. Maria frowned, apparently deep in thought.

“Wait, the Capsicle knows how to kiss?” Tony muttered in the comm.

“Yes he does,” Natasha said, “I had to kiss him when we were undercover.”

“Oh, I have got to find footage of this,” Tony said. Bucky tried his hardest to ignore the random conversation in his comm. Instead he finished Maria’s sandwich and slid it to her, hoping that she didn’t notice him spacing out.

“Does he still tell you everything?” Maria asked, as she picked at her sandwich warily. Bucky inwardly cheered in his head, as this conversation was going exactly how he wanted it to but kept his face impassive.

“Yeah,” he answered hesitantly. Tony and the others were finally silent on the comm, hanging on their every word. Maria looked around, checking her surroundings if Bucky was correct. Then, she spoke in her usual authoritative voice.

“JARVIS, this conversation is off record. Agent Maria Hill Override Code 912-037.” She turned to Bucky then, with an almost embarrassed look. It was the most emotion that Bucky had ever seen on the Commander's face.

“I kinda don’t want Tony having any record of this conversation,” she said in response to his unspoken question. Bucky smiled at the irony, as Tony was able to listen to every word through his comm, but instead asked her a question.

“So what’s on your mind, Agent Hill?”

“Well you told me that you knew everything about Steve, because he tells you everything,” she started.

“Yes,” Bucky answered.

“This morning Steve came into my office with a strange request. Out of the blue, he asked to me to prank the Avengers.” Maria said. Bucky merely raised his eyebrows in fake surprise, as if he hadn’t witnessed the entire event on JARVIS’s screens.

“Steve does know how to prank people,” Bucky said.

“Yes, well it’s not about that. It’s what he asked me to do.” She stopped for a second before continuing. ‘He wanted me to not laugh at whatever Clint, Tony or Natasha say or do.”

“Ahhh,” Bucky said. pretending that a huge revelation had come over him.

“I'm ready do it and all but not laughing at something isn’t really a prank,” Maria finished.

“I’m not sure if Steve would be happy if I told you the context of this.” Bucky replied.

“I’m not sure you will be happy if you don’t tell me the context of this,” Maria said, with a threat underlying her voice, paired with an equally frightening glare. Even if Bucky wasn’t supposed to tell Maria about the bet, he was pretty sure he would have spilled it right about now. Maria’s glare made him want to blab everything from his inner childhood secrets to his deepest fears. He could see why Steve liked her; she was similar to Peggy, at least intimidation wise.

“Clint, Tony and Natasha made bet about you. Basically, whoever makes the Ice Queen, aka you, laugh, wins an all expenses paid dinner at Pepper’s.” Maria frowned when Bucky had said her nickname, but otherwise showed no reaction, so Bucky plowed on.

“So Steve got mad and joined in on the bet.”

“Wait what?” Maria started.

“Well apparently, they kinda implied that you were heartless and that made Steve pissed, so he decided to join the bet, then come over to you to make sure you didn’t let Clint, Tony or Natasha win because he thought they were dicks.” Then, Bucky stopped, pretending like he had given away too much information.

“He’s defending me against Clint, Tony and Natasha? I can take care of myself. I don’t need him to be my knight in shining armor.” Maria retorted angrily.

“But I’d bet he’d still like to be your knight in shining armor.” Bucky replied cheekily. Maria’s mouth was rounded in surprise.

“No, he doesn’t,” she protested weakly.

“Oh please, Maria, he joined a bet to defend your honor, you know like a knight in shining armor. Or really, in his case, a knight with a super patriotic shield. Anyway, that’s how guys from the late 1940’s court people,” Bucky replied. Maria suppressed a snicker.

“Court?” Maria said, and he heard Tony giggle on the comm.

“Yeah, court. Oh, what do the kids call it these days? ‘Hanging out?’” Bucky quoted with his fingers. Maria shot him an amused glare, but still looked unsure like she couldn’t believe a word he said.

“And don’t tell me you don’t like him,” Bucky snapped. He was on a roll now, and wasn’t going to stop. “You said that you always trust him. That my friend, is super flirtatious,” he smirked gloatingly, but the smile quickly slid off. Bucky realized his mistake as soon as he said it; he had quoted Maria from a conversation he technically shouldn’t even have heard. Maria glared at him suspiciously, and Bucky flailed in his head for a response.

“When did I ever say I trusted him?” she asked, her face closing up with that familiar mask again. Bucky didn’t know how to respond, but luckily Tony came to the rescue on the comm.

“Tell her that everyone trusts Captain America. He’s a national icon for God’s sake,” Tony blurted in a rush. Bucky took Tony’s words and fed them to Maria.

“Captain America is a national icon. Everyone trusts him.” Bucky explained, knowing Maria was probably not convinced at all, and he had to change the subject immediately.

“Don’t change the subject. You like him, don't you?” Bucky questioned, and suddenly Maria found something immensely appealing on her sandwich, and stared at it for quite some time. Bucky sighed in resignation.

“Well, if you do, you would follow along with his prank, and then go out to dinner with him. Lord knows, how much he would love that, you know, considering that he lurves you too,” he said. Before Maria could retort, Thor walked into the common room.

“Brother Barnes, kindly make me one of your sandwiches. I am greatly fatigued from my workout,” Thor boomed as he walked into the kitchen. Bucky chuckled at him and fully appreciated his timely arrival. He also loved the fact that Maria hadn't responded in her usual fashion and instead seemed to be deep in thought.

”I’ll fix you one right away Thor,” Bucky said.

“Ugh, I wish I could have one” Pepper groaned as she strolled in as well. Tony had probably sent her in as their time with Maria was cut short. She stopped short at the sight of Maria not reacting to both of them entering the kitchen.

“Is Lady Maria quite alright?” Thor asked in concern, as he picked Maria’s untouched sandwich and started eating it for himself. Pepper shrugged and waved her hand in front of Maria’s face, and finally she came out of her stupor.

“Pepper! Right! Your file!” she exclaimed loudly and scrambled for the manila folder that was right in front of her. Bucky picked it up with his metallic hand, and handed it to Maria, who seemed to calm after she’d received the folder in her hands. She wordlessly handed the folder to Pepper, and failed to make eye contact with the any of them. She was biting her lip, indicative of being in deep thought. Ever the diplomat, Pepper ignored the weird reaction of Maria and began to speak.

“Well Maria and I have a meeting with a company called Oscorp so we’d better be going. Come along, Maria.” she said, and the ladies walked to the elevator and spun around to face the doors. Pepper glanced back at Maria’s face, and gave Bucky a victorious grin as the elevator doors slid shut.

“That was strange,” Thor said, before promptly attempting to find more food in the pantry.

“No Thor, it was actually perfect.” Bucky replied. He couldn’t help but mirror Pepper’s victorious smile, as he ran to the stairs and descended into Tony’s workshop.

“That was also strange,” Thor remarked, before he continued his pursuit for Pop-Tarts.

**:~~:~~:~~:~~:~~:~~:**

Clint watched on JARVIS's screens as Maria and Pepper walked away, presumably heading into the elevators. Though Maria had used her override code, Tony had convinced JARVIS that there was no point in blocking the conversation. They were hearing it through Bucky's comm anyway.

Clint tapped a key, bringing up the elevator feed, and saw Maria with her recognizable mask back in place. It was in that moment that Clint felt like the world’s biggest prick. Maria was supposed to be his best friend, only equivalent to Natasha and Coulson. Though he didn’t know everything about her, he knew enough to able to read her emotions. Even then, he had never

figured out that she liked the Captain. Out of all people, Tony Stark had deduced that Maria harbored a crush (and that the Cap reciprocated) and developed the huge plan to get them together. Clint had first gone along with it disbelievingly, but now he could see that his best friend felt something toward the Captain and he had never picked up on it.

Shaking himself out of his critical thoughts, Clint looked up at see Tony and Natasha, who were crowded around the monitor with him.

“So that went better than expected, right?” Clint asked. Personally, Clint thought Bucky knocked it out of the park. He had known Maria for a long time and she never believed anything without a mountain of evidence, but it looked like Bucky had done it in a matter of minutes. He'd made her believe that Steve liked her. However, Tony and Natasha’s lack of response made him feel a tad nervous. Did they think that Bucky failed? Just then Bucky waltzed into the workshop, grinning brightly.

“So how did I do?’ he asked, arms wide spread. Tony and Natasha didn’t say anything and stared at him impassively. Clint shrugged at his friend’s questioning glare.

“I got the same response.”

“Say, aren’t you supposed to be this killer assassin who is also exceptionally talented in the art of espionage?” Tony asked in a somewhat sarcastic tone. Clint liked where it was going already and leaned back into his chair.

“Yeah,” Bucky answered hesitantly. Apparently, he had caught the mockery in Tony’s voice too.

“And you’ve done this for about, oh well I don’t know, maybe seventy years?” Natasha asked, feigning a certain nonchalance.

“Yes.”

“Then how is it that you slip in front of Maria Hill out of all people?” Tony asked, and Clint had to cover his mouth with the nearest grease rag to stop himself from laughing at Bucky’s expression.

“Well, she’s scary...”

“Scary?” Tony asked incredulously. “You’ve had to fight Hydra Nazi’s, and Maria Hill is who you find intimidating?”

“She’s got the stare you know?” he asked, gesturing toward Clint to help him out. Clint did know what Bucky was talking about; he had been on the receiving end of that glare every time he had goofed out on a mission, but he wasn’t going to admit that and dig Bucky out of his hole.

“What stare?” he asked innocently, and promptly received received a high five from Tony.

“You know, the I'm going to slay you alive stare?” Bucky responded, and Natasha couldn't help but giggle.

“Oh really? I’ve never noticed it. Have you, Tony?” Clint asked. In the midst of chuckles , Tony answered.

“Nope, can't say that I have.”

“See,” Clint said, “I think you are the only person to see this stare, Barnes.”

“Well, I won’t be soon, because now it’s time for Phase 4--making Maria laugh.” Bucky replied.

“Who’s going first?”

Instantly, Tony placed his finger on his nose and screamed “Not it!”

The others rolled their eyes at him but smirked. Natasha, however, gave Clint an evil smirk. _Uh oh_ , he thought.

“I think Clint should go first,” she said, and Clint almost fell out of his chair. He didn’t want to go make Maria laugh. Despite being her friend, the stare was not something even he could successfully fight off. The only recorded case of resistance was in 2012, when Nick Fury dodged the stare to tell her to gather the Avengers, an initiative she didn’t approve of.

“Make your case,” Tony said, thoughtfully.

“Well, Clint has known her for the longest time, and if anyone could make her laugh, it would probably be him, then me, then you Tony. So, if we really want to see if Maria is going to follow Steve’s ‘prank’, we should send the hardest person to resist first,” Natasha reasoned.

“Oh, am I that irresistible?” Clint asked, waggling his eyebrows. At his face, Tony pretended to retch into the trashcan he seemed to pull out of nowhere, and Clint huffed in annoyance.

“So we’re sending Barton into the war zone then?” Bucky asked, and Natasha and Tony nodded in the affirmative.

“Wait, don’t I get a say in this?” Clint asked irritably.

“Nope,” the trio chorused and Clint had an urge to smack all three of them.

“By the way, what are you doing to make her laugh?” Natasha asked.

“Well, I guess you’ll have to wait and see,” Clint responded as he stood from his chair and walked out of the workshop. “I’ll be working on Phase 4 in my room if you need me,” he said as he jumped out of his chair and moved toward the exit of the workshop. He jogged up the stairs and made a beeline to his computer. Clint was going to need a lot of help from Google if he wanted his plan to work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You like this chapter? Drop me a comment!


	4. The Villain's Entrance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, a peek into what Maria's been thinking and some actual plot development.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo I love you all ~ thanks for the kudos, they make me so happy :)  
> Hope you like this chapter!

The average elevator ride lasted about 118 seconds. Being that this was a Stark elevator, Maria could safely shave 45 seconds off that time. That left 73 seconds to process the literal shitstorm of information that had come her way in the last half and hour. Good thing that she had practice with this.

**_73 seconds_ **

She thought back to the beginning of her conversation with Bucky, and how he said that he knew everything about Steve. She wondered if that was true considering that the man had only regained his memories and escaped his HYDRA programming two months ago. Maybe his words did have truth to them, but Maria couldn’t help but remember the strange way he had acted. There was something she didn’t know.

**_65 seconds_ **

She was going to slay Clint, Natasha, and Stark for making this ridiculous bet. Mark her words, she was going make them suffer. Maybe she’d hide Barton’s favorite bow, or lock Tony out of his workshop for a week. Oh, the possibilities were endless.

**_58 seconds_ **

Why did Steve want even to defend her honor? It sounded like something a person would do if they were straight out of Pride and Prejudice or Little Women. Was that still the norm during the 1940’s? Lord knows, it wasn't her style.

**_52 seconds_ **

Though it was kind of adorable...

**_50 seconds_ **

Focus, Maria!

**_48 seconds_ **

Bucky said that Steve was trying to court her. Come on, she was barely anybody. She was the exact opposite of Steve. She was a spy who had lived with secrets and lies her entire life, and fed them to others. He was a soldier who never hid anything from his team and was basically honest to a fault. She always thought in terms of logic on the battlefield; he went with his gut, not counting for any other variables. She loved Indian food, and they had discovered that he hated it with a passion. (Too spicy). This wasn’t right, they were too different.

**_32 seconds_ **

But they both loved Frank Sinatra and Jimmy Durante. They shared a real passion for Italian food, swapping recipes whenever they could. She’d send him her grandmother's famous recipes, and he would write up the recipes he remembered from his mother. They loved to watch old classic movies, because she had a soft spot for them and he wanted to catch up on the pop culture references that Tony and Clint constantly made.

**_24 seconds_ **

Lord, was she going soft? She should have never applied to work at Stark Industries.

**_22 seconds_ **

Bucky said that Steve “ _lurves_ ” her. And if she did too, she would go allow along with his prank. Maria didn't know a thing about love, at least she used to think she did, but that vanished years ago. She was not about to bring those memories back up again.

**_15 seconds_ **

She decided that she would go along with the prank, only to make sure that Natasha, Clint and Tony did not win the stupid bet. She could only stand Steve winning, because of his noble reasons.

**_8 seconds_ **

Maria shooed away her thoughts as they approached the floor of Pepper’s office. She smoothed down her black skirt and adjusted the navy blue belt that was holding it in place. She hoped her shirt was still tucked in correctly, but had no more time to worry. Her 73 seconds were up.

**_0 seconds_ **

“Ready for Norman Osborn?” Peeper asked as the doors opened.

“Can anyone really be prepared for that man?” Maria asked sarcastically, as she stepped out of the elevator beside Pepper.

“I wonder if he’s still after Steve’s blood,” Pepper mused, stomping down the hallway to the conference room. Pepper’s bodyguard, Happy, trailed after them, though Maria didn’t see the receptionist, Emily, who usually greeted them at the elevator.

“Having known him for years, I’m pretty sure he’s still after it. Is it not clear to him that we will never hand over Steve, his blood, or any of Erskine’s or Howard’s journals?”

“Years? You’ve known him for years?” Pepper asked, and Maria realized her slip. No one was supposed to know that she personally knew Norman Osborn at one point in her life.

“Oh, I just meant SHIELD wise. We tend to keep an eye on billionaires with advanced technology.” Maria covered quickly. She thought she had made a great save, and it was confirmed by the placated look on Pepper’s face.

“Then as you know, Norman Osborn doesn't like the word “no”. Let's see what he has to say,” Pepper said, as she opened the door and was greeted by an ugly scene. Emily, the aforementioned receptionist, was standing nose to nose with Norman Osborn, the billionaire.

“Is it impossible for the word “no” to get through your thick headed skull? I thought you were supposed to be some sort of genius. Huh, at least Mr. Stark’s an actual genius, not a fake parading around like you!” She said, venomously, the effect being doubled by her thick British accent.

“Emily, I assume you have somewhere else to be?’ Pepper stepped in before Norman retorted. The petite, blond receptionist turned to Pepper, her face flushed red with anger, but instantly reverted her voice to a calm, serene tone that definitely wasn’t present before.

“Yes, Miss Potts,” she said as she walked out of the room. Maria caught Emily’s eye and winked; someone should put Norman Osborn in his place, and Maria was glad it was the tiny receptionist. Emily gave her a wide smile back as she exited the conference room.

“Norman,” Pepper greeted, “I apologize for that. It will never happen again,” She comforted the fuming man. Personally, Maria was hooping that JARVIS had got the entire incident on tape to show it to Tony. Even though Maria and Tony weren’t best friends, they shared a mutual hatred toward Osborn.

“Virginia,” Norman greeted and Maria could spot the mini scowl Pepper gave Norman. Pepper hated that name, which was why she used her nickname instead, despite its informality.

“How lovely to see you again. And--” he stopped short at Maria’s face. _Bet you didn’t expect to see me_ , Maria thought in her head as she smiled and grasped Osborn’s hand that was extended in a handshake.

“Maria Hill, Mr. Osborn. Shall we take a seat then?” she gestured to the chairs, and noticed that Norman had brought lackeys, as if he was threatening them. Maria ground her teeth in frustration as she and Pepper took a seat across from Norman, and Happy stood a ways off, monitoring the situation.

“So what can I do for you, Norman?” Pepper asked. Norman didn’t respond right away, he stared at Maria for a moment, and seemed like he wanted to say something. Instead, he took a water bottle that was on the table and sipped before replying. Maria thanked God that he didn’t say anything about her.

“You know why I’m here, Virginia. I want the samples of Captain America’s blood, the notes on Project Rebirth, and let’s throw in Dr. Bruce Banner’s notes on the Hulk,” Norman stated, putting his bottle down and crossing his arms.

“As I’ve said before, I’m afraid we can’t do that, Norman.” Pepper shook her head to emphasize her point. Maria saw Norman’s eyes flare with anger, and turn slightly green. She sat up straight, paying more attention to Osborn and his lackeys now. There was a bad feeling in her stomach.

“You and I both know that SHIELD dumped those files a year ago to make sure that the public had access to it. We are the public,” Norman gestured to his creepy henchmen. “and we are not leaving without those files.”

“Actually,” Pepper interrupted, producing papers from the manila folder that Maria had brought her, “Stark Industries has claimed Captain America and both Erskine and Howard’s journals as intellectual property. Dr. Banner has also done the same thing for his research,” Pepper finished. Maria couldn’t help but grin at the shocked look at Osborn’s face.

“You--” Osborn started, but Maria cut in; she couldn’t really help herself.

“What this means, Mr. Osborn, is that you will never be able to even be in the same room as this research. So, I suggest that that you grab your associates and leave.” Maria said, in a low and threatening voice, not unlike the one she had to use when Stark and Barton were being particularly child-like.

“But I need the serum,” Osborn pleaded, and Maria raised her eyebrows. She exchanged confused glances with Pepper, because she could have sworn that Norman Osborn had just begged, and that was something he would never do.

“I’m sorry Norman,” Pepper said in a gentler tone, ”but I cannot give you any of that research.” Instantly, Maria knew something was wrong. There was a look in Norman’s eyes, as he stood angrily from his chair. It reminded Maria of Loki, a combination of malice and mischief which instantaneously made Maria wary. She stood from her chair with Pepper and she could sense Happy moving closer.

“Fine,” he snarled, sounding inhuman now, eerily similar to the voice of the Hulk. “If you won't give it to me, well I’ll find another way,”. As much as his threat surprised her, it was something else that had captured Maria’s interest as Norman Osborn had stalked out of the conference room.

The back of Norman Osborn’s neck was green.

**:~~:~~:~~:~~:~~:~~:**

“Did his neck just turn--”

“Yup,” Maria cut through Bucky, rubbing her forehead, as she did so. It was about the third time she had answered this question, and frankly it was getting on her nerves. All of the Avengers, including Bucky, had arrived when Maria had sounded the alarm. They stood in front of her watching the video feed that JARVIS was playing, for the third time. Finally when it stopped, they all turned to each other confused, though surprisingly Thor seemed unfazed.

“He is no worse than a Jotun,’ Thor said to Maria’s unspoken question.

“He has anger issues and turns green. Sound like anybody else you know?” Bruce asked sarcastically.

“I don’t think he’s a version of the Hulk,” Maria said.

“Yeah,” Tony added, “we would have noticed another Hulk in New York City by now.”

“If Osborn had presumably turned into the Hulk, he would need Bruce’s research to do so. But he came here in search of that and Project Rebirth. He needs something else.” Natasha correctly deduced.

“That’s not the only way I know that he’s not a copy of the Hulk.” Maria said. “JARVIS, can you pull up the DNA analysis of Norman Osborn?”

“Yes, Ms. Hill. It will be completed in a moment.” JARVIS politely answered.

“When did you get his DNA?” Clint asked. Maria was about to answer before Steve interrupted.

“She took it from the water bottle he drank from,” Steve responded, waving toward the screen. Maria felt faintly proud that he noticed, and shot him an appreciative smile.

“Exactly.” she confirmed, and he smiled back.

“Ugh, please have your eye-sex elsewhere,” Tony groaned. Steve blushed, and Maria was just about to retort, when JARVIS’s voice rang through the common room.

“Results are ready, Ms. Hill. I will put them up now,” the A.I. said. A light blue hologram popped up, displaying the DNA sequences of Norman Osborn. Bruce and Tony rose together to look at the results.

“Well, there are no signs of the tell tale gamma radiation that would appear in the DNA,” Bruce said, after slipping on his glasses.

“But his DNA has been altered. See there, and there,” Tony said, pointing at the screen.

“I have no clue how that could happen though. JARVIS, can you see what the mutations in his DNA help him do?” Bruce asked.

“It appears that they increase the intelligence, strength, speed, reflexes, and healing rate of Mr. Norman Osborn., sir” JARVIS answered.

“So, basically everything Capsicle’s serum does, but Steve’s DNA is way different then Osborn’s,” Tony observed on the screen.

“How do you even know my DNA?” Steve asked incredulously. Maria sort of wondered the same thing. It wasn’t exactly normal for someone, even Tony Stark, to memorize a person’s DNA.

“Research to find you a pain killer that would actually work with your metabolism,” he brushed away. Steve, Bucky, and the rest of the Avengers looked mildly surprised at that statement, but Maria just shook her head. Of course, Tony was doing something adorably nice that made her kind of tolerate him.

“That is very kind of you, Anthony,” Thor said, basically stating everyone’s thoughts, even though they would never admit it. Tony ducked his head for a moment, but soon looked back up at the screen as if nothing had happened.

“Well, since the work isn’t from Project Rebirth or Bruce, it’s gotta be someone else’s. Can

JARVIS run a scan of medical papers, theses, etc to see whose work is similar to this?” Maria asked.

“You wound me, Commander Hill. JARVIS, do as the lady said,” Tony demanded. Maria rolled her eyes but looked at JARVIS’s screens. Soon the A.I. came up with a result.

“Professor Mendel Stromm,” Maria read off the screen, and realization set in for her. The memories came flooding back, and Maria felt like puking. She knew that name and who this chase was going to lead to.

“Maria?” Steve asked, concern evident on his face. She wished for Steve’s famous hugs, that made her feel like everything was going to be okay but that was not an option. She cleared her throat and waved her hands in a placating gesture.

“It’s ok, I’m fine. I just made a connection. Whoo, a really big one, actually,” she said, as she tried to harness her thoughts which were running at a million miles per second. She rubbed her forehead and paced for a minute trying to go through her memories. She looked at it from every angle, but the first conclusion that came to her head most the most logical sense.

“Norman Osborn is the Green Goblin,” she stated, and Tony, Clint, Bruce and Natasha looked at her as if she had grown a second head.

“Pray tell, who is this Green Goblin you speak of?” Thor rumbled, but Maria paid no attention.

“Great, now I have to call him,” Maria groaned. The rest of the Avengers looked confused: Tony, Bruce, Clint and Natasha probably because they didn’t understand who she had to call, and Thor, Bucky, and Steve because they were still confused as to who the Green Goblin was. She grabbed her phone and started dialing.

“Wait, who are you calling?” Bucky asked. Maria sighed; she knew this would come up eventually.

“My ex- fiancé,” she replied. She would’ve laughed at Tony and Steve’s shocked faces, and was ready to cry at the betrayed looks on Clint and Natasha’s, but instead kept her cool.

“And what does your ex- fiancé have to do with this mess?” Tony questioned. Maria didn't hesitate.

“He’s Spider-Man.”


	5. The Return of the Dead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony tries to wrap his head around the fact that Maria was engaged to Spider-Man, and of course has to find out the whole story, and we all know Maria ain't ever going to tell him, so he gets a little creative, and resurrects the dead (not really).

Tony could actually feel his mind shutting down at those words because he just couldn't  comprehend them. Maria had been engaged to Spider-Man? His eyes quickly landed on Clint and  Natasha, hoping they would have some kind of answer, but the two assassins looked as bewildered as himself.

He watched as Maria finished speaking into the phone, and slid it into her back pocket. She was looking tenser than he had ever seen her. Tenser than during the last Stark Gala she was forced to attend by Pepper. He glanced sideways at Steve who looked shocked at the news of Maria’s ex- fiancé.

Oh no, his ship was falling apart!

“Ok wait, despite being a genius, I didn’t understand a thing that just happened right now,” Tony said. Bucky nodded in agreement.

“I think the first question that my teammates shall answer is who is Spider-Man and the Green Goblin,” Thor demanded.

“Spider-Man is this superhero that appeared in New York, around 2008. He has certain powers of a spider, like he is able to shoot webs and crawl across walls,” Natasha answered.

“And the Green Goblin was a villain that appeared in 2014. He basically has powers like Steve, enhanced strength, intelligence, and so on., except that he’s green and creepy looking. He flies around this hover board.” Clint supplied.

“So why have we not met this foe in battle?” Thor asked.

“Because at that time SHIELD had more pressing problems, like how it was infiltrated by  Hydra,” Maria answered.

“Ok, so how in the world were you ever engaged to the Spider-Man?” Tony asked, believing that this was really the crux of the matter. Maria rolled her eyes.

“I dated him in 2004; we were both 22 and going to SHIELD Academy. I was there to become an agent, and he was there to hone his skills to become an effective vigilante. We got engaged in 2008, and he took up the title of Spider-Man. Shortly after, we broke up,” Maria said, not offering up any more information. Tony glanced suspiciously at her but didn’t try to push it. If Maria hadn’t even told Clint and Natasha about the brief engagement, then something probably went really sour.

“Ok, now how do you know that Osborn’s the Green Goblin? I mean, even Spider-Man doesn't know who the Green Goblin is,” Bruce asked getting around to the final question Tony wanted an answer to.

“In 2014, Professor Stromm was murdered after there were reports that he had created a  super serum of his own. At the time, we sent one of our agents to investigate because there was  evidence that a contaminant had been spread, aka his superserum. A couple of days later, the Green Goblin emerged from nowhere. We knew then that the contaminant must have been exposed to the Goblin, but we never figured out his civilian identity. Plus, we couldn't investigate further because that's when hell broke loose and SHIELD fell.” Maria answered.

“But now you know that it’s Osborn because you matched the mutations in Osborn’s body to Stromm’s work!” Clint concluded excitedly.

“Exactly,” Maria confirmed.

“And so now we wait for your ex-fiancé?” Tony asked, still not understanding how Maria and Spider-Man had ever got together. Maria scowled at him and Tony realized that he probably shouldn’t have referred to Spider-Man as her ex-fiancé. Hey, just because Tony was a genius doesn’t mean he knew how to be sensitive. In fact, people skills always seemed a little out of reach for him.

Maria turned on her heel and stomped out of the room.

“Call me when he gets here,” she said, as she retreated, and Tony’s apology died in his throat. He turned toward the Captain, who was staring at her figure with an expression of betrayal not unlike Clint and Natasha's.

“Go after her, Cap,” Tony said. Reluctantly, the Captain rose from his seat, looking like the last thing he wanted to do was to talk to Maria, but Tony resolutely stared him down. He was not allowing his ship being destroyed because of some lame spider. (Actually, Tony thought Spider-Man was pretty cool, but he wasn't going to admit that now). The Captain heaved in annoyance as he left the room following Maria.

Tony turned on the two twin assassins ready to interrogate them to the last detail, to see if maybe Maria had once let a detail slip. But before he could say a word, Natasha put up her hands defensively.

“Don’t look at us. All we knew was that she was assigned to New York, right out of the  Academy.”

“I can’t believe she was dating Spider-Man!” Clint said, awestruck, like a little kid.

“If it were not for Lady Maria’s deep rooted antipathy toward him, I would have suggested adding him to our team.” Thor rumbled.

“Now we know why SHIELD never recruited him to Avengers Initiative. It seems like Maria  really hates him. Like really, really hates him,’ Bruce added.

“So how do we get Steve and Maria together if her ex- fiancé pops out of nowhere? Will the The Bet work?” Bucky asked.

“Oh we’re shipping Lady Maria and the Captain?” Thor asked, looking incredibly pleased at his use of modern terminology. Tony really shouldn’t have taught him that word. Instead, he glared at Bucky because telling Thor of their plan would mean that the entire tower, including Stark Industries employees, would know about it in a matter of minutes. Oh well, other people that were not supposed to know about the plan had figured it out. It couldn't hurt to tell Bruce and Thor.

“I suppose I blabbed to Pepper so we might as well tell Point Break and Green.” Tony said. Bruce looked up sheepishly and Tony knew immediately that Natasha had told him.

“I thought you didn’t want to know!” Tony exclaimed. Bruce rubbed the back of his neck, slightly grinning.

“Ever heard of the saying, curiosity killed the cat? He asked me so many times after that I just had to tell him,’ Natasha said.

“Fine, is there anyone else who knows, so I’m not blind sided by all this betrayal?” Tony  exaggerated. The room didn’t move until Barton slowly raised his hand like six year old admitting to stealing a cookie from the cookie jar.

“I had to tell Laura, but the kids eavesdropped so they know too,” Clint explained, as Bucky stifled his laughter.

“Y’all suck. At least, don’t tell anyone else guys, especially the ex-fiancé,” Tony concluded.

“Which brings us right back to the problem, Spider-Man. I mean what if she has residual feelings for him or something?” Clint asked.

“Did you see all that hate? I think we can safely rule that out,” Bruce countered.

“Not so,” Thor frowned. “In  _ Sweet Home Alabama _ , Melanie still ended up having feelings for her estranged husband even after seven years.” Tony slowly spun to face the Asgardian prince.

“Did you just reference a Reese Witherspoon chick flick? I mean you know this, but you don’t know the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek?” Tony exclaimed, annoyed by the lack of priority.

“I think the more important question is, how does Tony Stark know this movie?” Bucky asked. 

“Doesn’t seem to go with the whole Black Sabbath theme you have going on there,” Clint noted.

“It was for Pepper--” Tony was cut short by a red headed assassin.

“For Pepper, or forced by Pepper?” Natasha questioned, smirking.

“Is the distinction really necessary?” Tony whined.

“Yes, because we want to hear you say it,” Bruce answered, grinning.

“Et tu, Bruce? Ok, it was Pepper’s birthday and I was forced by Pepper to watch a bunch of chick flicks so now I am intimately familiar with the plots of Sweet Home Alabama, 27 Dresses and others that I’m not admitting.” Tony stated.

“Excellent choices, Anthony,” Thor praised.

“You watched the The Notebook and The Titanic didn’t you?” Bruce asked.

“I can neither confirm nor deny those accusations.’

“Oh my god, you cried didn’t you?” Clint asked.

“Back to our original problem, Spider-Man--”

“Brother Anthony, it is ok to admit that you had shed tears at the lovely courtship of Noah and Allie or the death of Jack,” Thor comforted. Tony looked at the faces of the Avengers and wondered why he had ever decided to allow them into his home.

“Might I remind you all that you live here for free and I gratuitously provide amenities and food? It’s not easy to feed all of you, I lose like a ten thousand dollars a day. Now back to our main problem, my ship, Captain Hill, is about to sink by an iceberg-I mean, a spider!” Tony quickly corrected.

“Captain Hill?” Bucky questioned, smirking.

“Iceberg?” Bruce asked.

“Didn't watch The Titanic, huh?” Clint added.

“Shut up, or I will taze you until you lay drooling on the floo-” Tony stopped midway,  remembering how he had once been threatened this way by a certain SHIELD agent.

“Did he just become speechless?” Bucky asked.

“Is that possible?” Natasha chipped in.

“It could be Loki’s magic...” Thor suggested.

“Brain freeze?” Clint put in.

“No, I have seen that look before. That’s his _I’ve got an idea_ face.”

“Is it usually that creepy?” Natasha asked, pressing into Bruce’s side.

“Yup, now we just decide whether to run away or listen,” Bruce answered.

“Follow me, minions! I have an idea!” Tony exclaimed, as he stalked out of the living room and descended into his workshop.

“Anyone up to dying?” Bruce asked dryly as he rose from the couch.

“Well, it has been a slow day,” Bucky replied as he followed the eccentric genius into his workshop.

“When has it ever been a slow day on Midgard?” Thor asked, walking in front of Clint, Bruce and Natasha.

“Now you’re getting it, Thor.”

* * *

 

Tony was typing as fast as he could on his computer, simultaneously hacking and commanding JARVIS. He could hear the rest of the Avengers finally descending into the workshop, but didn't address them to keep up an element of surprise. He couldn’t help himself; he had a flair for the dramatics.

“Come on JARVIS, pull up the files on The Bus,” Tony commanded, on his computer. “Start tracking them now, so I can hack the communications.”

“They are now located in California, sir,” JARVIS answered.

“Excellent, let’s get cracking. Break the firewalls and call for assistance when you need it,” Tony said, as he spun in his chair as his fellow Avengers came to a stop.

“Took you long enough,” he snorted.

“Wanna tell us why you ran in here like a kid on a sugar high?” Bucky asked.

“Because, my formerly indoctrinated soldier, I know how to figure out Maria’s past.” Tony answered.

“How? Even Natasha and I didn’t know about this,” Clint answered.

“Well, there’s another person who might, who I’ve never mentioned to you. Please don't kill me for it because I’ve only known about it for like two weeks,” Tony said.

“Just explain first, Tony,” Bruce cut in, slightly irritated.

“Whoa, cool your jets, honey. No reason to let out the rage monster yet.” Tony said, as he turned to grab a hologram floating by him “Remember the little robot we were fighting about two months ago?”

“You mean Ultron, right?” Clint asked with a snort. “The one you created to protect this world but almost ended up destroying it?”

“Boy, how many times does a person have to apologize! You guys can keep a grudge!”

“Can I punch him?” Clint asked.

“Later,” Bucky promised. “Continue, jackass.”

“No love,” Tony muttered. “Anyway, remember how Maria and Fury showed up out of nowhere with the Helicarrier? Like how in hell could Maria hide one? Impossible, right? And Fury was supposed to be dead, so he can’t be hanging around with a flying submarine. That would defeat the entire purpose of staying off the grid.”

“What does it matter?” Thor asked.

“Ah, you asked the best question of the night, Point Break. It matters because who fixed up that Helicarrier? Lord knows, the Hulk destroyed a lot of it and Steve and I barely fixed the engine. So how was it in perfect, working condition ready to save the poor civilians of Sokovia?” Tony looked at his audience who finally seemed captivated by his words.

“Could you get to the point?” Natasha asked.

“Patience, my grasshopper. So I did some digging and found this in the SHIELD dump.” He hesitated to expand the hologram that was clasped in his fist. “I’d like to make it clear that I’ve only known about this for two weeks--”

“Yes, yes, now tell us!” Natasha snapped. Tony went ahead and finally enlarged the hologram.

“Meet Theta Protocol. Run by twin brothers, Sam and Billy Koenig. And their commanding  officer was--” Tony was cut short by his A.I..

“Sir, I appear to have run into some resistance while hacking the Bus’s communications.” Tony groaned internally at the disruption of his big reveal.

“One second, my audience members.” He jumped onto his chair and felt everyone crowding  around him, but his eyes were finely tuned to the programming on the computer. He couldn't help but let out a gasp of surprise. Someone was counter hacking JARVIS, trying to prevent him from getting into the systems.

“Hey, this hacker is good, J.” Tony murmured.

“Observe: the first compliment Tony has ever given,” Bruce remarked.

“But not as good as us, J” Tony added, and Bruce rolled his eyes. “Ok, three, two, one!” Tony clicked a last key, and the first image that popped on the screen was of a young girl, with short dark brown hair, staring intently at her computer screen.

“Hello there, sunshine,” Tony said. “Smile, you’re on camera.” The young girl popped up and her mouth rounded in surprise.

“Crap.” she cursed.

“No, not crap. The Avengers plus The Winter Soldier here.” Tony replied.

“What happened Daisy?” an Irish accented voice inquired, and a young man appeared on the screen before he began to curse.

“Frack. This is not good. He is going to kill us.” he stuttered out.

“Shut up, Fitz. You’re not helping.”

“Is that Dr. Banner?” another voice queried, tainted with a British accent, before another face appeared on the screen. Her short, chocolate brown hair covered Daisy's face.

“Dr. Banner! Oh, I am a huge fan of your work!” Bruce adjusted his glasses and seemed a little surprised.

“Thank you. And you are?” Bruce asked confusedly.

“Simmons. Dr. Jemma Simmons. And this is Daisy Johnson and Leopold Fitz. Oh and Fitz loves your work, Mr. Stark,” Jemma finished.

“Who doesn’t?” Tony replied. But before he could say another word, another voice was heard on the screen.

“Mr. Stark?” a female’s voice asked, and stern woman’s face appeared on the screen. Her eyes widened but she didn't voice her surprise.

“Melinda?” Natasha asked.

“What is The Cavalry doing there?” Clint questioned.

“Oh, he’s not going to like this,” Melinda muttered.

“Who is this “he”?’ Thor asked.

“Daisy, FitzSimmons, May, who are you skyping?” a familiar voice asked. Though Tony had learned two weeks ago that he hadn’t died, something still stirred in his stomach as he heard that snarky voice. Apparently, he wasn’t the only one, as every Avenger froze, as well all the people from the video chat. A man with a receding hairline appeared on the screen, and Tony could read his shock on his familiar features.

“Avengers, may I present to you the commanding officer of Theta Protocol, Director Phil   Coulson,” Tony introduced, remembering what he had read off the Theta Protocol files, about two weeks ago.

“Fuck,” Coulson muttered, and the room erupted into chaos.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked the new chapter!


	6. The Ever Wise AI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve kinda feels betrayed that Maria never bothered to tell him about Spider-Man but JARVIS the therapist sets him straight. Maria tries to decide whether she should tell Steve about her past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay!  
> Hope you like the new (kinda filler) chapter!!

If Steve had really tried, he probably would have been able to catch up to Maria as she slipped into the elevator. Alas, he didn’t, and he watched as the elevator climbed out of reach. He knew where she was heading, so that wasn’t a concern. However, he had spotted her wiping her eyes, which meant he needed to find some hot chocolate fast. See, no matter what, hot chocolate was the solution to all problems, or at least that was what Maria Hill preached.

Steve found himself being taken by the practice too, as alcohol and coffee didn't have the same effect on him anymore. Maria had noticed and whenever he had come back from a particularly hard mission, there would always be a steaming cup of hot chocolate waiting for him in his room. It was only time that he returned the favor, no matter how betrayed he felt.

“JARVIS,” Steve called, as he reached the kitchen, “Could you make me two cups of hot  chocolate?”

“Certainly, sir. Just place two cups under the coffee machine, and I will take care of the rest,” the AI replied.

Dutifully, Steve located the cups and slid the two under the machine. Then, he leaned back on the counter as he stared at the coffee machine that was whirring to life. He finally let the collection of information that was floating in his head to be released.

First things first, they had a new villain in town, the Green Goblin. Technically, the Goblin had been around for a year now, if Steve’s calculations were correct. Nevertheless, he was on the Avenger’s radar now so that was that. 

Steve wasn’t actually disappointed with this development. Though it had only been two months since they had defeated Ultron, Steve was itching for some combat. Pounding the punching bag and sparring with his teammates was not action-y enough. The thrill of battle was something that had been elusive to him for a long time now, and to be frank he was really happy that the Green Goblin was around. That being said, he wasn’t happy about what the Green Goblin was bringing with him: Maria’s ex fiancé, Spider-Man. 

A familiar sensation of betrayal slithered up his throat, and made him want to choke. The last time he had ever felt this way was when realized that Pierce and Sitwell were Hydra agents. Now, it was because of Maria.

Steve had told Maria everything about himself, even all the classified stuff that was embedded deep within the redacted sections of his files. How he’d been chosen for Project Rebirth, how he met Peggy, and how he’d defeated the Red Skull. He didn’t leave out a detail from his mother’s birthdate to Colonel Phillips’s favorite color, including that embarrassing USO tour. In return, Steve thought she had told him everything too, though it had taken quite some time. Eventually, Steve learned about the quiet origins of Maria Hill, the not so excellent childhood, and why she joined SHIELD. She had even told him how Coulson was still alive and well, and heading up SHIELD now.

This stung—the fact that she hadn’t trusted him enough to tell him about Spider-Man. Steve could feel his trust cracking with Maria. Really, he should have expected this; once a spy, always a spy.

The shrill of the coffee machine disrupted Steve from his angry musings. He was glad for it anyway because his thoughts were about to foray into dark places. Steve quickly grabbed the cups and made his way to the elevator, even though he still wanted time to himself.

“Take me to the roof, JARVIS.” Steve said, tone clipped.

“Of course, sir.” JARVIS said, and the elevator ascended. Steve watched as the numbers increased on the display. The closer he got to Maria, the faster his heart was beating. He didn’t feel like talking to Maria and frankly wanted to avoid the confrontation; he was only going because Tony pushed him to. Just as the numbers flicked to the word roof, the elevator froze and the lights flickered.

“JARVIS, why did the elevator--”

“My apologies, sir, it was me. I noticed that your heart rate was fluctuating and I was concerned about your well-being,” JARVIS answered. “Is there something wrong, sir?”

“No, JARVIS, nothing is wrong,” Steve automatically replied.

“Sir, I do not find it wise to lie to the AI that is currently controlling your elevator right now.” Steve had to agree with that but that it didn't mean that he was going to give up easily.

“I’m telling you JARV--”

“Before you attempt to lie again sir, let me remind you that you will never be able to leave the elevator, even if Mr. Stark demanded me to release you. Now though this is not conventional, I assure you that I am an excellent listener. So, sir, what is troubling you?” JARVIS questioned, sounding quite persistent and firm. Steve felt like he was being backed into a corner, or in this case an elevator. It did not help his angry mood at all, but it was obvious now that he had no other option but to disclose his feelings to the AI. However, it seemed that JARVIS was impatient for his reveal.

“Is it because Miss Hill’s ex fiancé is swinging by?” JARVIS asked dryly, and Steve couldn’t help but roll his eyes. Were his feelings evident even to a machine that couldn’t even see?

“Yes, it’s related to that.”

“No, sir I think it's mostly that.” At Steve’s pause, JARVIS continued. “You feel betrayed as  Miss. Hill had not told you about her ex- fiancé, and this is complicated by Mr. Stark’s ridiculous bet, the arrival of the Green Goblin, and your own affections for her. Have I explained the situation accurately enough sir?”

If it was possible, Steve would have walked away at this point because hearing his predicament aloud seemed to make him feel worse.

“Yes, JARVIS, you’ve described it perfectly,” Steve muttered bitterly.

“Hmm,” the AI pondered thoughtfully, “That is quite a handful indeed, but if I was able to aid Mr. Stark with Miss Potts, I’m sure I would be able to help you.”

“Really?”

“In addition to controlling this tower, I am also a part time therapist apparently. The members of this team seem incapable of talking to actual human beings, and well they turn to me for help. I’m only offering my services because you’re the only person that hasn't used them yet.”

“Oh,” was all Steve could faintly say in response; his mind was kind of focused on wondering whether Maria had told JARVIS about Spider-Man. Well, JARVIS had said that the entire team has turned to him at one point or another. He quickly ruled it out in his head because if she hadn’t told Clint and Natasha about Spider-Man, she probably wouldn’t have revealed it to the AI. Reluctantly, Steve realized that he was being petty, something that Captain America wouldn’t be, but something Steve Rogers was certainly capable of.

“What did I do wrong, JARVIS?” Steve asked tiredly as all of his anger suddenly converted to resignation. He settled on the floor of the elevator as it was evident to him that this conversation was going to take a while.

“I don’t think you have done anything wrong, sir.”

“Then why wouldn’t she tell me about this? I told her everything about myself and I thought that she would trust me enough to at least do the same. Seems as if she doesn’t.”

“Miss Hill may have her own reasons for choosing not to disclose this to you. This doesn’t mean you are not trustworthy.”

“Of course it means she doesn't trust me! What else could it possibly mean?” Steve asked. The AI didn’t answer right away, and Steve took that silence as an affirmation that he was correct. That is, until, the AI suddenly asked him a question.

“Has Mr. Stark revealed the full account of his Afghanistan kidnapping to you, Captain?”

“No,” Steve confusedly answered.

“Does that mean Mr. Stark does not trust you at all?”

“That’s different,” Steve protested, but the AI paid him no attention.

“Has Master Barton ever told you about his childhood in the circus? Did Miss Romanoff ever explain the Red Room to you? Has Thor revealed the reason why he was cast out of Asgard? Has Dr. Banner ever sat down with you to discuss why he decided to create a replica of your super serum?” At Steve’s silence, JARVIS continued.

“No, sir, they have not revealed these things to you, but that doesn’t mean they do not trust you. It’s just that those memories bring up to much pain to handle, and it is easier to hide them away in the shadows, then let them see the light of day. I would assume Miss Hill went with the easier path.” JARVIS finished, and Steve didn’t respond for a moment.

“Do you really think so, JARVIS?” Steve asked, feeling more like a little kid by the moment.

“Yes, sir. You have not done anything wrong and you are absolutely trustworthy. You have not ruined your chances at courting Miss Hill. So I suggest that you wrap up your own self pity session and go aid Miss Hill. She is understandably distraught.”

“Are you sure that Tony didn't program that snark into you?” Steve asked as he rose from the floor and the elevator doors slid open.

“Yes, sir. Unfortunately, it was a product of my environment.” Steve stifled a laugh as he climbed onto the roof. Talking to JARVIS had actually given him a sense of peace. Now it was time to see if he could do that for Maria as well.

**:~~:~~:~~:~~:~~:~~:**

Maria heard Steve before she saw his large frame taking the seat next to her. She had expected his arrival, but quite earlier. After making himself as comfortable as he could in the small wooden lawn chair, he wordlessly handed her a cup of hot chocolate, which she gratefully accepted.

“That's a nice sunset,” Steve said, as he sipped his cocoa and kept his eyes trained on the  horizon. Maria couldn't help but let out a snort.

“That's all you have to say?” Maria asked incredulously, turning to look at him. She'd sorta  expected an interrogation, considering that she hadn’t told him about Spider-Man and he had told her everything about himself.

“Depends on if you want to say anything?” Steve asked, his baby blue eyes landing on her. The betrayal that Maria had seen in the Avengers common room had somehow been replaced with clarity, but she didn’t ask about it. Instead, she carefully refocused her eyes on the setting sun.

“Have nothing to say.“ Maria said. Steve exhaled, as if he wasn’t surprised at all, but rather  pleased, as if something had been proved to him.

“So I guess we wait until you let your memories escape from the shadows.”

“Huh?”

“A wise man just told me that the people in this tower are likely to hide away memories than experience the pain they bring,” Steve stopped and turned to look at her. “So I won’t push you about Spider-Man.”

“Thank you,” Maria said sincerely, even though she was a little surprised at the consideration. She knew that if Clint and Natasha were up here instead, they would’ve interrogated the living hell out of her. She felt her heart warm a little and beat a little faster; it was probably due to the gratitude.

“But..” Steve started, and Maria felt her stomach drop, because no good phrase had ever started with the word ‘but’, “I would like to kindly remind you that there are others willing to share the burden with you. You just have to give them a chance,” he finished, returning back to his hot chocolate and the wonderful view.

_ Oh no _ , Maria thought, Steve’s speech was perfect, completely endearing, and didn't push any boundaries. She could only assume that his charm was a product from his 40’s era. Now she was going to feel bad if she didn’t tell him.

There was actually a legitimate reason for Maria not disclosing this part of her life to anyone else, except Coulson of course. The end of her relationship with Spider-Man was probably what had made Maria Hill, the slightly reticent rookie agent fresh out of SHIELD Academy, to Maria Hill, the Ice Queen deputy director of SHIELD. Needless to say, the end of that relationship had hit Maria hard.

Reliving her memories from that experience would only serve to make her feel weak and  vulnerable. Emotions like pain and nostalgia tended to do that. But she also supposed that Steve was right, that sharing the burden would lift the weight off her shoulders and let her finally breathe, just by releasing everything that she was hiding in the shadows.

Plus, if would probably better if Maria had told him everything so Steve didn’t have to hear it from Spider-Man. She should give him that at least.

Then her only problem now was figuring out how to shoo away her shadows because they had been haunting her for a long time, and she had learned to live with them. As relieving as it sounded to let it all go, she was afraid of what might happen. Would Steve think any less of her because of her complete inability to talk about one relationship that happened eight years ago?

Maria took a sip of her now cold hot chocolate to soothe her dry throat, and also for some kind of strength. For strong emotional stuff like this, Maria would usually replace her standard hot chocolate with liquor, but that wasn’t an option right now.

“What if giving them a chance makes me seem weak?” she blurted out. The only way this was going to happen was if got some kind of reassurance, which was really out of character for Maria Hill because really the last word that would ever be used to describe her would be insecure.

She watched as Steve gaped, probably not expecting her to actually respond to anything he had said, but to his credit, he quickly composed himself.

“When has Maria Hill ever been anything but strong?” he asked out of exasperation, as if he couldn’t possibly fathom a world where that wasn’t possible. The confusion on his face powered her more than the liquor she had been craving a couple minutes ago.

“Fine, I’ll tell you about Peter, well, Spider-Man,” she huffed out, as if she was mad. Steve didn’t say anything, just smiled a “shit-eating” grin, as Tony would say. He reached over and took the mug out of her hand, and placed it on the cement floor. Then, he rose from his own seat, took his chair and placed right in front of Maria. For some reason, the closeness bothered Maria more than usual. She had never felt this way when they went out on those lunches.

“Whenever you’re ready,” Steve said. Maria let out a breath to relax herself.

“Well, here goes.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reviews would be nice...they're like food for my soul :)

**Author's Note:**

> How'd you like it? Drop me a comment, please! :D


End file.
